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School’s out for summer!!!!

June 11, 2014

This school year was sandwiched with transition. At the start, with the birth of Zoey in September and at the end of the  with a diagnosis of stage 3 cancer road tripping to the Mayo Clinic. Both experiences have been hard on my eldest child, Amelia who also started and completed kindergarten. It’s been a hard year for her, lots of transitions. Some overt, like above, some a bit more hidden in her space, her personal experience with our world. A place I can try my best to understand,  but will never fully experience. This is part of her individuating from myself and my husband, and it’s sometimes appears to overwhelm my 6 year old. But she needs to stretch, not until it’s painful, but until she feels the release in her own time, I her own space. When it is too much, I want her to know I am here, we are here, to support her, love her, and be her haven. We all need a haven. Some of us never had the soft landing, the unconditional acceptance of our parents. As I raise my children I see more and more how this was lacking in my own childhood. I am blind, not really sure how to do this, how to provide a soft haven for my little chicks, but I’m trying while simultaneously creating one for myself, within myself. And this might be the best example my children see is a woman, their mother, accepting herself as she was, as she is, and for who she will become. To see their mother love herself, not in a way that diminishes or distracts from her love for them but mirrors it.

Schools out for summer, but the learning never stops.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. January 21, 2015 9:00 pm

    Stage 3 cancer? That sounds rough. You ok?

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